choice between 2 men? Friendship and love or friendship, possible love, great prospects but great loss?

I hope someone can point me in the right direction as i have a huge confusing dilema.

I need to make a choice between 2 men.

Man 1 i have been seeing for 4 and a half years, he makes me laugh and feel good and he is very attractive to look at and i still fancy him after this long.
He is quite lazy, cant realy handle his drink to well ( not abusive just an idiot when drunk) quite un ambitious, quite selfish … there are lots of little niggles someof which he is actualy changing and improoving on. I do love him although i have broken up with him a number of times but always come back. I know he loves me but can often be quite aloof and unresponsive ( although he can also be very loving etc)
I broke up with him in dec last year, we continued to see each other as if nothing was changed, in jan i said i wanted to get back together … he said no, he didnt know what he wanted, i was upset and we continued seeing each other and havng sex but noy boyf/girf i would get upset every now and then and ask to get back together and he would say he didnt know ( he says this was becasue he was scared i would leave him again) … anyway now he says he wants me back for good…

However i have now been seeing man 2 for 3 months

Man 2 is lovely, he treats me like a princess, takes me out al the time etc, he is fun and friendly, we get on amazingly and its like we have known each other for a long time, he has great friends and family ( man 2 doesnt) he gets on with anyone and everyone inc my friends, hes very hardworking and wants me to move in with him and look after me , he thinks the world of me and says he loves me and i feel i could also love him if it wasnt for man1. The one thing against him is that i dont fancy him to look at and he doesnt make me laugh like man 1 … he does however have a big **** and is very very good in bed ( where as man 1 isnt)

But man 1 was not only my boyf but has become my best friend and i will loose him completly if i go with man 2.

The thought of seeing or hearing about man 1 with another woman makes me feel sick to the stomouch …..

Am i holding on becasue ive been with him almost 5 years and he is my security .. and so scared of letting go..or not feeling love like i did for him with man 2 ….. arrrrgh

Also i dont want to hurt anyone and im going to so hate myself for that.

i feelmi want to settle down, im 29, and makea home and maybe have kids soon … this wont happen with man1 as there wud not be enugh money and he doesnt want that now, man 2 would.

so its man 1 who i love, but who can annoy the crapouta me, make me laugh and sparkle, but no goodin bed, lazy and low prospects but getting better etc and very good looking or

man 2 not good looking, but great in bed still fancy him, great future prospects, treats me amazingly, get on so so well … but with him i will loose my best mate man 2.

Advice please!!!!!
1 day ago – 3 days left to answer.
Additional Details
Just wanted to add that i didnt cheat, i waited for 6 months for man 1 to say he wanted to be with me again .. but after 4 i thought f8ck it and went on a date with man 2.

Also man 1 is getting better and trying more .. but yes there will be no chance of having kids for maybe another 4 years and we will struggle ans i will have to work and not do the things i hope for .. where as with man 2 i will and can
1 day ago

Also man 1 doesnt realy have many other friends he is a bit of a loner ( apart from me) we dont really socialise with others . Man 2 is the oposite ans i love that, i want to have friends and socialise together etc man 1 says he will change but i dont think its that easy and he is pretty set in his ways.
1 day ago

I do love man 1, if i didnt it would be an easy choice. I feel like i will loose a part of me if i cant spend time with him anymore ..
15 seconds ago

this is almost the exact same thing going on with me. except in my situation i am guy #2.

it wasn’t meant to be with guy #1 and you should definitely choose guy #2.

i actually just asked a question about it as well. here is the link.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090619103013AAKqX1O&r=w

maybe it will help to read the thoughts of a guy in a similar situation.