When it comes to the men I become involved with recently I have become a softy… letting them come and go as they please and walk rite over me. Pull me this way and that way. In and out of insecure relationships. How do I become a heartless and ruthless bytch? I think Im too pretty to be treated liked this and I need to find my old ruthless inner self. Can u help me??
I’m dealing with the same problem. Many peple tell me that I’m just too nice and it is seen as a weakness so people automatically try to take advantage of me. Also people tell me that I need to know how to say no and MEAN IT!! There’s no maybe when it comes to guys. I simply need to grow a backbone and put my foot down. I agree with them. I’m tired of being walked upon or having guys treat me any way they chose. But after my most recent breakup and being heartbroken and devastated after he DUMPED ME when I had full rights to kick him in the a-s-s for his treatment and actions, my inner biatch started to shine through. I’ll admit during the summer I cussed a lot of guys and was a complete wretch but after a while I realized that I still wasn’t happy and just because someone’s hurt me doesn’t mean that I have to punish others for their actions. So I cooled down a bit lol. But it’s not all about being a biatch. It’s about being confident and knowing what YOU want. I would simply say not to get too attached to guys and just weed through the sea of trash. CUZ TRUST ME THERE’S A LOT. And do not, I repeat, do not let any guy know EVERYTHING about you or your past. They only use it against you (i went through it). Men can be dogs. You have to play them at their own game and be one step ahead of them. Be very observant of them and don’t be afraid to instantly send them packing . There’s no need to waste time with pieces of s-h-i-t. And make sure show them that you’re independent and you can do fine on your own.
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13 users responded in this post
Be selfish and always put your needs, wants,and feelings before anything or anyone.
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There’s a difference between being a doormat and being a bltch. Find the happy medium.
I have a rule. If a guys does me wrong more than once, he’s gone. That’s it. No exceptions. And by "does me wrong" I mean: makes me cry, deliberately hurts my feelings, stands me up, doesn’t call when he promises to.
You have to have high standards and not let the guys get away with anything. But do it while being your happy, friendly self. And don’t give them warnings. That will just piss them off. If a guy screws up, make a mental note "strike one." If he does it again, he’s gone.
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I know how you feel, you need to just F@u*K it! An mean it, say Im tired of being Miss. Nice. I just got out of a situation where I used an walked on in everywhich way, Im putting my feet down an saying no more, an you should too. Gus think females are dumb, an just bc you act nice they think it means Hey take advantage of me
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Umm, stop letting them walk all over you. Don’t call them back. Leave after sex. Don’t have sex. Tell them how you feel every time. Look at them in the eyes when asking them questions and have them look directly into yours also.
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people become this way when they have been hurt alot by relationships they have had.
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Stop jumping in relationship with the same type of dudes in a different package. Get to know yourself, be confident of who you are, be stable, be educated, be aware, and then you won’t need a man to complete you but for you to be a compliment to him and in this way you are 100% woman who has a 100% man instead of 50% 50% men can smell neediness and weakness and then the go in for the kill.
Girl get up, stand up, learn how to say no and mean it, and stop getting in to a relationship just because of what he looks like and what he has. Get you own stuff and then try to be in relationships with men who already have their own stuff or can bring something to the table and you will not be dissuaded, persuaded or pull in any direction except the one that you want to in.
You’re already all that you desire to be – just stop wimping out.
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I am not sure how you do it,, mostly I think it’s just a mind set,, you have to believe in yourself and know that you are better than how you have been treated. I know this sounds super harsh,, but you need to date a couple guys whom you don’t really like so you can get used to being in control and being able to dump them and regain your control. Just don’t play games wtih them and break their hearts just practice with them.
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You do not have to by a bytch. Try to be selective in your mates. Grow a back bone and speak up. if they don’t like it then tell them how you feel and if they have a problem there is the door. It’s truly hard in relationships, however if you can still take risks and feel good about them you will soon find your soul mate. Good luck!
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You’re still allowing yourself to be pushed to extremes if you think your only options are being spineless or bitchy. Heartlessness is just a different kind of insecurity: one where you lash out unnecessarily instead of refusing to stand up for yourself. What you should be aiming for is open and assertive. In order to do that, you have to figure out what you want and how you deserve to be treated as a person, not as someone guys are going to find "pretty."
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Well as I am a ruthless cold hearted biatch when it comes to guys, I had my heart broken so bad that it caused me to be this way. I put up a wall that has been up for 3yrs. Now, I feel like I need to let it down slowly as I want a relationship and Ive hurt so many guys myself. I just tell myself not to think of it seriously and that all guys want is sex and to use girls. I pretty much act like a guy and when you learn to do that, you dont wear your heart on your sleeve. It takes practice. Guys are like toilets-dirty, unavailable and full of crap!!<<—Tell yourself this everytime you talk to a guy. Be nice but dont expect anything from them and you will learn to just be independent.
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You want to be like me!
come on now its just not your character to be like that.. ruthless and heartless… you were born compassionate and caring and letting people be aware of that shouldnt be punishment for you.. if they share the same intentions as you when going into the realationship they would treat you with the same… by being compasionate and caring.. people who cant respect you and have never been given compassion and care treat others the way they were taught be treated by walking all over others which is WRONG! Set an example and try to show them how.. I suggets before getting into any relationship getting to know the person who you can potentially see yourself dating before you jump into anthing cus when you do then they think they can walk all over you automatically you put them in controll becuase there the ones that asked you out and you acepeted so there showing you the way.. and by tha "walking all over you" now im not saying ask every guy who your interested in so u can do the same lol im saying that when a guy does ask you out get to know them tell them how bout we get to know eachother first .. and see how it goes.. the minute you start seeing sings of bossyness and controlingness leave because thats a sign they will walk all over you. All you need to do is change the way you enter into a relationship.. get to know them first then.. if you like how they are then proceed.. that way your not getting walked over on.. its having it your way!
hope you listen to me
best of wishes kesha!
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I’m dealing with the same problem. Many peple tell me that I’m just too nice and it is seen as a weakness so people automatically try to take advantage of me. Also people tell me that I need to know how to say no and MEAN IT!! There’s no maybe when it comes to guys. I simply need to grow a backbone and put my foot down. I agree with them. I’m tired of being walked upon or having guys treat me any way they chose. But after my most recent breakup and being heartbroken and devastated after he DUMPED ME when I had full rights to kick him in the a-s-s for his treatment and actions, my inner biatch started to shine through. I’ll admit during the summer I cussed a lot of guys and was a complete wretch but after a while I realized that I still wasn’t happy and just because someone’s hurt me doesn’t mean that I have to punish others for their actions. So I cooled down a bit lol. But it’s not all about being a biatch. It’s about being confident and knowing what YOU want. I would simply say not to get too attached to guys and just weed through the sea of trash. CUZ TRUST ME THERE’S A LOT. And do not, I repeat, do not let any guy know EVERYTHING about you or your past. They only use it against you (i went through it). Men can be dogs. You have to play them at their own game and be one step ahead of them. Be very observant of them and don’t be afraid to instantly send them packing . There’s no need to waste time with pieces of s-h-i-t. And make sure show them that you’re independent and you can do fine on your own.
References :
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